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Always Wanted to Be

by Racecars

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1.
Newts 03:28
I woke up in a musky villa Alone without myself We don't have to wait until the sun is up To recreate our bed dreams and make ourselves happy We don't have to wait until the sun is up I like to drive to synths late in the night Fake bass and reverb make me freeze in time I woke up at a stranger's bedside Holding their hand tight And I shouldn't have waited until the sun was up Now I'm lending my comfort, helping them pass me on And I pray to god let me haunt their bassinet Synths don't hit the same way in the sunlight Sunspots reverberate off my green eyes I know I better be better at bein your bitter king Don't fall asleep on me And I know when morning comes I'll be back on my own Just a lizard in the sun, sunbathing when I'm gone I know I better be better at bein your bitter king Don't fall asleep on me And I know when morning comes I'll be back on my own Just a lizard in the sun, sunbathing when I'm gone My daddy's daddies' daddies Were one big family Their scales crooned heat that helped devise the earth I stalk the nights and bedsides The cool air hurts sometimes But I hate to hunt when the sun is up I like strings and dissonance in the daylight Loud booms and screeches thaw me back to time
2.
We don't have to talk about my truck We can just talk about your feelings Talk about them until the sun comes up I think I done said enough And shame on me for breaking our trust But as you know god created a lust I get a side eye and I'm bidding on luck But I promise I'll be attentive and this time We don't have to talk about my truck We can just talk about your feelings Talk about them until the sun comes up I think I done said enough And if you call my phone eighty times I'll pick up on the eighty-first We both know I make your life worse But one day I'll make good, I promise You are a person made out of love I know that'd be a real good thing for me There's only so many hours in a day But I don't have time, the boys are on one tonight And if you pray hard and often enough I know I'll come around to show you love I just got to get through these last rough bumps Pay off some people and I'll be there And if you pray hard and often enough I know I'll come around to show you love I just got to get through these last rough bumps Pay off some people and I'll be there We don't have to talk about my truck We can just talk about your feelings Talk about them until the sun comes up I think I done said enough And if I can get off these fuckin drugs And pay off the title on my truck Have a last night with my stray loves I promise I'll be attentive and this time
3.
I used to wear a big backpack But I converted to fanny pack But they hold a lot less, so I got to have three One around my waist, one around my body, and one tight around my neck They're getting too tight stretching myself too thin The one around my waist says I don't spend enough time with them The one around my body says I'm always distant And the one around my neck says I care too much about them At school, my textbooks fell out I'm dumb and I should've just stuck with that big backpack I tried to put back on that big backpack But it was on somebody else's shoulders that didn't turn back Backpacks, they hold a lot more and you choose how much they hold I fucked up and spread my space around tryin different styles of bags And it bites you in the ass when you miss just having one place To store all of your love and feelings to carry throughout the day Three fanny packs I chose to strap just didn't have as much space And it really wasn't fair to them that I zipped them up that way At home, couldn't find my homework It fell out on the bus ride home, now I'm gonna get a zero That night, couldn't find my lighter It fell out somewhere outside and I couldn't get High
4.
I don't know who you are But I'm gonna find you if I try Ever since I got my license I Been seeing the roads you're takin When you get home from work, what do you do? You drink wine Listen to Keith Urban and cry I don't know who I am But I know I'm good at tracking your path Under bushes I sleep real nice I feel your warmth through the brick laid When I make you my wife, what will you wear? You are the principal at my son's school And I am a P.I I get paid to follow people Reach in their lives, see what I can find It worked out and we made it so far I know you'll love me until we die Ever since I got hitched again my life has been on this cool and steady When you get home from work, what do you do? You drink wine with me and feed our son
5.
I saw her in the sunlight for the first time last week We were walkin, actually talkin, and we're goin on a date I can't wait to see her again I really like the way she dressed Lookin like she came out a magazine from 1998 That aesthetic that I like You dress down Got me thinkin bout you in sunlight But with style That aesthetic that I like You dress down Wanna see more of you in the daytime, not just the nighttime She said "let's go thrifting" I said I'm super down But when we got to the thrift store I just watched her look around She bought Ralph Lauren overalls And some high-waisted cargo pants And them strapped up sandals she said she'd never wear but I know she knows she can That aesthetic that I like You dress down Got me thinkin bout you in sunlight But with style That aesthetic that I like You dress down Wanna see more of you in the daytime, not just the nighttime We started out just playin round But I like what we found Holding hands out in public Got to tell her how much I love it Now I know she don't like compliments that much But I just got to gush Lookin real good every single day Happy this is turning into more of a sunlight thang That aesthetic that I like Got me thinkin bout you in sunlight That aesthetic that I like Wanna see more of you in the daytime We started out just playin round But I like what we found Holding hands out in public Got to tell her how much I love it That aesthetic that I like You dress down Got me thinkin bout you in sunlight But with style That aesthetic that I like You dress down Wanna see more of you in the daytime, not just the nighttime
6.
nascar dad 04:51
It ain't fair, but I know it to be true By myself, I can make my way better Even light of all this worst But I can't lie, it hurts my heart to know That we are truly helpless And that all that we love will soon burn It'll all burn I've always wanted to be a nascar dad, a nascar dad Way too buzzed for a Sunday, my wife checking in every 50-some odd laps I've always wanted to have a couple kids Let them run around, let them be their selves I've always wanted to be a nascar dad, but the world won't last I know there be people hanging round Starting families, having babies Bringing them into a life that'll hurt them Big men ruling the world don't care about us and our paths They just want to burn our world to the ground because they can They know they can I've always wanted to be a nascar dad, a nascar dad Way too buzzed for a Sunday, my wife checking in every 50-some odd laps I've always wanted to have a couple kids Let them run around, let them be their selves I've always wanted to be a nascar dad, but the world won't last Profit margins are more valuable than people Why would I try to family when I know things will be even harder so soon? For all of us out there, yeah then soon enough for everyone I don't want to bring kids into this life without asking first And I can't I've always wanted to be a nascar dad, a nascar dad Way too buzzed for a Sunday, my wife checking in every 50-some odd laps I've always wanted to have a couple kids Let them run around, let them be their selves I always wanted to be a nascar dad, but the world won't last

credits

released January 13, 2023

Tanner Hearren - vocals, guitars, lyrics
Jake Martino - drums
Jonathan Lumsden - bass
Andrew Pinson - guitars

Recorded by Josh Garner in Murfreesboro, Tennessee
Mixed by Jake Martino
Mastered by Bob Sandifer in Macon, Georgia

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We're Trying Records Austin, Texas

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