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Self​-​Acceptance Speech

by Old News

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Dalice Malice
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Rich Mancinelli
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1.
Pulling Teeth 03:04
lyrics
Love me like you’re pulling teeth Addict of our codependent sleep Well we haven’t talked all afternoon and I leave the city soon I’ve got some growing up to do and So do you Love me like a flame consumes Honest for the sake of salting wounds Will you kiss me in the waiting room because I leave the city soon I’ve got some growing up to do but I’m so tired of feeling this way and I know you’re tired of my dead weight So let's just cut our losses and cut each other out and I’ll move away So fuck me like you fucked my friends Build me up to tear me down again We’re just passing time under waning moons because I leave the city soon I’ve got some growing up to do but I’m so tired of feeling this way and I know you’re tired of my dead weight So let's just cut our losses and cut each other out So let's just cut our losses and cut each other out So let's just cut our losses and cut each other out and I’ll move away
2.
Heads Like Projectors 04:19
lyrics
First and last initial on the dotted line Pray for insurance I hope our conversation lends some peace of mind Only one in the waiting room who’s wearing black or looking exhausted But they’ve called my name and Its way too late to go back home Quiet little moments on repeat Projecting in my skull Go ahead and dim the lights so I can see Drinking in the twilight to sustain my recollection I’m at peace with my regrets I will drown in self reflection I am losing to my vices I am lost with no direction Bony shoulders start to bend under the weight Stages of grief, hurry up I’m ready for acceptance So push me over the edge I’m not getting better I’m getting worse Starting with your parents and your greatest fears Don’t change the subject Let’s dig through the baggage you’ve carried alone For twenty years Staring at old magazines, all gone unread Sobbing pathetically Appointment is over Don’t leave me alone with my head Quiet little moments on repeat Projecting in my skull Go ahead and dim the lights so I can see Drinking in the twilight to sustain my recollection I’m at peace with my regrets I will drown in self reflection I am losing to my vices I am lost with no direction Bony shoulders start to bend under the weight Stages of grief, hurry up I’m ready for acceptance So push me over the edge I’m not getting better I’m getting worse Life is both a blessing and a curse So pull me down closer to the earth Bury my bones Look over the edge The city is an anthill when you’re starting over head Debate spreading my wings Look over the edge The city is an anthill when you’re starting over head Watching from a distance Watching from a distance Watching from a distance Watching from a distance Stages of grief, hurry up I’m ready for acceptance So push me over the edge I’m not getting better I’m getting worse Life is not a blessing, its a curse So pull me down closer to the earth First and last initial on the dotted line Pray for insurance I hope our conversation lends some peace of mind
3.
JPS 04:10
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Overwhelmed Decisions to make Perpetually anxious Hurry up just to wait for the future Oh no, I can barely breathe Oh no, cities to flee Oh no, Ii can barely breathe Oh no, cities to flee Hollow hearths, empty homes Glacier hands, brittle bones Bags are packed, always waiting Paralyzed, hesitating Questioning My place and my worth Relentlessly restless Get up, get out, get away Oh no, I can barely breathe Oh no, cities to flee Oh no, Ii can barely breathe Oh no, cities to flee Hollow hearths, empty homes Glacier hands, brittle bones Bags are packed, always waiting Paralyzed, hesitating I’m not bitter, I am afraid I am afraid and I am ashamed I’m not bitter, I am afraid I am afraid and I am ashamed I don’t know how to get out of my head I don’t know how to get out of my head I don’t know how to get out of my head I don’t know how to get out of my head, Get out of my head, get out of my head, get out of my
4.
1917 Cherry St. 03:29
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5.
722 Harter St. 00:39
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6.
I Don't Care 03:34
lyrics
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Project your life unto mine Protector of hearts and minds You know better Staggered steps on hardwood floors Echoes from the argument Reverberating off the walls and Slipping under my door Who are you to tell me how to live my life Never asked for your advice on anything at all Who are you to tell me how to live my life Never asked for your advice, ‘cause I don’t care at all Pre-recorded message Left on the machine Shadows haunt the hallways Cut me at the seams Run for cover Staggered steps on hardwood floors Punctuate your arguments by punching holes in drywall Whiskey pouring under my door Who are you to tell me how to live my life Never asked for your advice on anything at all Who are you to tell me how to live my life Never asked for your advice, ‘cause I don’t care at all Who are you to tell me how to live my life Never asked for your advice on anything Who are you to tell me how to live my life Never asked for your advice, ‘cause I don’t care at all, At all At all at all Hypocritical oath Practice what you preach Skeletons in closets speak When you’re lying through your teeth Hypocritical oath Practice what you preach Skeletons in closets speak From the floorboards underneath Hypocritical oath Practice what you preach
7.
Dancing In The Light 04:23
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When I’m high I just wanna be sober When I’m sober I just wanna get stoned So I can ignore the voices, maybe make better choices. ‘Cause the party’s here and I’m alone ‘Cause the party’s here and I’m alone I’d rather be at home. Hiding from the light Hiding from the light Hiding from the light Sleeping in some parking lot when I’m too drunk to drive Closing bloodshot eyes Drifting off to silent rumination Traffic lights’ illumination I’m hiding from the light When I’m in I just wanna go outside and When I’m out I just wanna hide my eyes So I can block out the sunlight Maybe focus on my hindsight ‘Cause the party’s gone and I’m alone The party’s gone and I’m alone Sober up Standing in the light Woke up in your parking lot when I was too drunk to drive Open bleary eyes Staring up at spinning constellations Front porch light illumination Now I’m dancing in the light Woke up in my bedroom somehow I made it alive Closing bloodshot eyes Misplaced wallet, keys, and expectations Morning light, illumination
8.
Flicker 01:28
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9.
Happy Pills 03:27
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Brand new pills and Brand new potions Brand new words and Brand new motions Vibrance and vitality Return of personality We’re all slaves to serotonin Lost between Spring and sensibility Torn between Daydream reveries I’m acting adolescent My whole life is iridescent On these happy pills my doctor gave to me Second thoughts through Second glances Second guess my Second chances Analyze anxieties Deciphering duality Take my daily dose of reason I need a reason to stay Lost between Spring and sensibility Torn between Daydream reveries I’m acting adolescent My whole life is iridescent On these happy pills my doctor gave to me Stumbling through conversations Side effects of medication I’m a slave to serotonin Disregard my hesitation Keep me under observation I’m a slave to serotonin I’m fighting to stay awake I’m fighting to stay awake I’m fighting to stay awake I’m fighting to stay awake I’m fighting to stay awake Stumbling through conversations Side effects of medication We’re all slaves to serotonin Disregard my hesitation Keep me under observation I’m a slave to serotonin and fighting to stay awake
10.
Sunday Suit 03:15
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Drinking down that Communion wine Thought I heard a voice from god but now I think I’m fine Find me hiding under church pews again Always looking for the answers in my sins Show up in my Sunday suit Off white collared shirt with Scuffed leather shoes I will offer up my apathy Exchange it for tenacity ‘Cause God ain’t got no cure for disbelief Hallelujah Hallelujah Hallelujah Hallelujah Fathers mind did come undone Only hear what you want to hear when you only speak in tongues Find me hiding under church pews again Always looking for the answers in my sins I will offer up my apathy Exchange it for tenacity ‘Cause God ain’t got no cure for disbelief Hallelujah Hallelujah Hallelujah Hallelujah How can I believe in anything at all How can I believe in anything at all How can I believe in anything at all How can I believe in anything at all

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released October 15, 2020

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